GLOBAL DIGITAL TIMES | How to find out your own and your partner's love language - in a relationship there are bound to be problems that arise whether it's a relationship with a family partner or even your friends. One of the causes of problems that often occur, especially between you and your partner, is not fully knowing yourself  .

Also with each other it could be because you don't know the language of love or the love language of you and your partner. Even though love language is very important in maintaining the harmony of your relationship with the people you care about, if you don't know what the love language of you and your partner is 

Doctor Gary Chapman is also a couples counselor, during his time as a couples counselor he found a pattern of problems that often arise in a relationship. One party in a relationship always feels that his partner doesn't love him.

Meanwhile, the partner doesn't know what to do anymore because they feel they have done everything from this pattern, Doctor Chapman concludes that everyone has a different personality so the ways to express and receive love are also different.

So, this method falls into five categories which are finally called The Five  Love languages, as previously mentioned, there are  five LOVE LANGUAGES, namely 

The first is Words of Affirmation. This is the simplest Love Language because it is an expression of affection both verbally and in writing which contains words of praise or appreciation. If Words of Affirmation is your partner's love language, he will enjoy positive words and encouragement from you.

Your partner will feel very loved if you express a beautiful sentence, for example 'I really love you, you can also do a simple compliment like I like your outfit.

While the broader one can be in the form of a poem or song, therefore the words you  say will really mean a lot to your partner. on the other hand your partner will feel offended and really hurt if you give negative comments to him.

When your partner's main Love Language is Acts of Service he will feel loved  when you do small positive things or actions for him.

Examples of small actions that can make your partner happy, for example cooking food for him, helping with chores or delivering him home. All of these actions are of course reasonable to do with good intentions and certainly not forced.

The third is Giving Gifts or receiving gifts. If this is your partner's love language, he or she will feel that giving gifts from you is a symbol of love and affection. 

He not only appreciates the gift but also the intention and effort you put into giving the gift. Besides that, the gift doesn't need to be expensive. How come you don't need to buy your partner Gucci shoes or a Dior wallet, even the slightest item,  he will surely accept because it shows that you really remember and care about him.

Usually people who have this Love Language can remember every little gift they received from the people they love, because it is so exciting for them.

If your partner likes to enjoy time together with you, you can say he  has this one love language. Your partner will feel very happy when you  give full attention to him while spending time together.

Your partner will feel loved when you are there beside him and focus on him,  make sure you make eye contact and don't focus on your cell phone. Then if you  cancel a date or postpone time together you can hurt his feelings and he will feel that you care more about other things than him.

The last love language is physical touch, people who have this love language feel that nothing else matters apart from the physical touch of their partner.

if your partner has one love language, he will feel loved when you show physical affection, such as holding hands, holding shoulders,  hugging and touching meaningfully on the face or arms 

Your physical presence is very crucial for your partner. That's why LDR couples might encounter many obstacles if you  and your partner have this love language.

As humans we feel and express love in different ways and therefore understanding these differences can have a good impact on our relationships.

According to doctor Chapman, understanding love language and our partners is the simplest way to improve a relationship. Besides that, there are other benefits of knowing this love language, namely:

1. Love languang is considered to be able to reunite couples who are starting to lose  their feelings. Besides that, understanding love language can also increase intimacy in a  relationship. They not only learn more about each other but they also connect with each other in more meaningful ways.

2. The second is that understanding love language will foster empathy. When you  try to continue to understand how your partner feels love, you will  learn to empathize with different people. 

That way, when  a couple commits to understand each other's love language, they  learn how to put other people's needs above  their own.

Those are the five love languages that will really help the continuation of a good relationship if practiced by your partner if you want to understand and be understood by your partner.

you need to tell him what makes you feel loved And you also need  maybe your love for the cost in the way you want it so which is  your love language?